This is the sort of thing I was referring to the other day!
This is the sort of thing I was referring to the other day!
Trigger Warning: ableism, abuse, rape culture.
I wrote this article because a recent episode of Glee included terrible messages about how people with mental health conditions exist within their relationships, especially romantic relationships. This is a topic that’s really close to my persynal experience, so I felt I needed to write about it to prevent my head from exploding.
Whether there is a sexism problem within the atheist community is really not up for debate. People affected by it have been telling you and telling you and telling you there is a problem. So when you say, “Sexism is not a problem for/by/about atheists,” those of us who have direct experience with sexism hear, “I like things fine the way they are and thus would rather spend my time antagonizing the people who say they’re hurt than the people causing the pain.” And we conclude that you are awful.
Finally, if your solution to sexist abuse on the internet is, “Just don’t let anyone know your gender, or see a picture of you, or ever mention where you live” (as one of the first commenters on Watson’s post suggested), you are so fucking awful, I can’t even. It’s not just that you’re putting all the onus on the targets of hatred to change so that bullies won’t have to, or that you’re conveniently ignoring situations, in almost 20fucking12, where a woman might want to have her picture and contact info on the internet for, I dunno, business reasons? For example? And it’s not even that you’re representing yourself as someone who’s clearly more internet-savvy than the lady blogger in question, but you apparently don’t realize that a highly motivated person can pretty easily discover the identity behind a pseudonym. No, it’s that you’re arguing that abuse of women online would solve itself if only women disappeared from the internet.
“You Are Awful, Too,” Kate Harding
Click through to read the whole thing; it’s great.
Ryan Gosling, in a letter protesting the NC-17 rating of ‘Blue Valentine’. The rating was based on one consensual sex scene, in which he goes down on Michelle Williams. (via goodgirls-like-to-sin)
RYAN GOSLING REALLY IS A FEMINIST!
Affection is only one ingredient of love. To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients—care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication. […]
Most of us learn to think of love as a feeling. When we feel deeply drawn to someone, we cathect with them; that is, we invest feelings or emotion in them. That process of investment wherein a loved one becomes important to us is called “cathexis.” In his book* [M. Scott] Peck rightly emphasizes that most of us “confuse cathecting with loving.” We all know how often individuals feeling connected to someone through the process of cathecting insist that they love the other person even if they are hurting or neglecting them. Since their feeling is that of cathexis, they insist what they feel is love.
When we understand love as the will to nurture our own and another’s spiritual growth, it becomes clear that we cannot claim to love if we are hurtful and abusive. Love and abuse can not coexist. Abuse and neglect are, by definition, the opposite of nurturance and care.” —bell hooks - all about love, 2000
Mia Mingus, Moving Toward the Ugly: A Politic Beyond Desirability (via classycoochie)
This is one of my fav quotes from her speech.
Because this is will always be relevant.
Reading the power of the terms “fit” and “fit for” throughout the history of last two millenia or so is a great way to assess the truth of this statement. This is a really productive way to study dis/ability: thinking about the proliferation of synonyms for “able” and how they serve as wedges of legitimized marginalization. Thanks, great post.
I had a really great pride this year, but I was also troubled by comments I heard over the last week from a lot of people in both the mainstream and radical queer communities. I want to say a few things about cissexism, specifically towards trans women and other MTF spectrum folks.
1) Gay sex does not require genital symmetry.
Most people in the community realize that not all women have the same sex organs, but it seems that a lot of people have a harder time making the leap to realize that you can have super gay sex with someone who has different junk than you. If you think otherwise, you are probably alienating people in your community, not to mention potentially missing out on some hot queer sex!
2) Gay sex does not mean non-potentially-reproductive sex (see point #1).
A lot of people like to claim the contrary… things like, “dykes never have to worry about getting pregnant” and other such nonsense. Claiming that all gay sex is non-reproductive erases the experiences of a lot of trans people and their lovers, and also makes it harder to talk about birth control and safer sex.
3) Don’t call different types of genitals disgusting.
This seems to be a disturbingly common trend in the queer community and has come up several times this week. A lot of people have a hard enough time trying to feel good and confident in their bodies - and welcome in their queer community - without having to hear how disgusting other people think their junk is. This goes for all aspects of peoples’ bodies.
Basically, we all need to have a little sit down and think about the different body/gender combinations that exist in our community and how the things we say and do affect the people around us!
Meryl Streep, on being told that she often plays “strong-minded women”
WHO LOVES MERYL?
- Commenter on Occupy Seattle Online Events (via rooftopsedge
“Men-ups!” is a humorous project by photographer Rion Sabean featuring men doing pin-up-style poses. It’s interesting how much more absurd some poses instantly look when they’re being done by men.
The creator of these is a girl at my school, USF! Woot!
why is this so great
Is that a real question or a rhetorical one? If its real I can explain why it is so amusing.
These are the questions we grapple with as Radical CUNTS
I have mixed emotions.
On the one hand, it lets me know I’m doing something right. Any time you stand up for the rights and personhood of those who are not white, cis-gendered, heterosexual, able-bodied, affluent males, people will say you’re crazy.
Or that you’re “making things about [racism, classism, cissexism, heterosexism, ableism, etc.]” when really that’s not what the issue is and you, silly little marginalized person with a lifetime of experience dealing with [-ism] are obviously just misinterpreting the situation.
But on the other hand, it really bothers me.
What is so radical about believing that people shouldn’t have to sacrifice parts of their identity in order to lead “healthy” lives?
What is so militant about believing that women of color deserve to be told they are as beautiful, as deserving, as special, as worthy of praise, as capable, as white women? What is so asinine about wishing that Black women weren’t always relegated to the bottom of the barrel?
What is so ludicrous about thinking that all women shouldn’t have to measure their worth by (how others determine) their beauty (based on Eurocentric colonialist standards)?
What is so ridiculous about wishing that children of color could grow up learning things about their history that did not revolve solely around slavery?
What is so naive about thinking maybe—just maybe—people could separate sex and gender?
What is so bizarre about the idea that freedom of religion does not just apply to Christians?
What is so “bohemian” about interrogating an economic system in which farmers are paid to dispose of their crops while countless people starve to death each second?
What is so avant garde about the idea that sex ought to be enjoyable for all parties involved—and not just those with penises? What is so “new age” about the idea that people should be taught what and where the clitoris is? What is so taboo about saying the word “clitoris”?
Someone, please tell me. Tell me how and why caring about people whom society screws over is radical. Tell me why hating oppression is militant. I’ll wait.
Womanist Musings’s post “A Forced Eugenics Survivor Speaks Her Truth”
The entire thing is an incredible and powerful read. I think of it any and every time I hear about the NC sterilization shit.
srsly. it’s hard for me to believe that someone can be an active advocate or believer in birth control without understanding at least some of the violent and fucked up history of eugenics. this is the finest example of needing to acknowledge and work with intersectionality that i have seen so far.
This is why I get so fucking pissed when people try to gloss over Margaret Sanger’s racist ass manifesto letter. The bitch WANTED black genocide and tried to use black ministers to do so. She WANTED forced sterilization of black and latino women. DO. NOT. DENY. THIS.
Conservatives are fond of willfully ignorant statements like: Our tax dollars shouldn’t go to abortion, so Planned Parenthood should have its funding stripped. We all know this is a lie. The information to debunk this claim is widely and readily available. Aside from the three percent of PP’s budget that goes to abortion care (and that 3% is privately funded, duh), PP’s wide range of health care services include:
- birth control
- emergency contraception
- checkups for reproductive and sexual health problems
- gynecological exams
- pregnancy tests and pre-natal care
- routine physical exams
- checkups for reproductive or sexual health problems
- colon cancer screening
- erectile dysfunction services, including education, exams, treatment, and referral
- jock itch exam and treatment
- male infertility screening and referral
- premature ejaculation services, including education, exams, treatment, and referral
- routine physical exams
- testicular cancer screenings
- prostate cancer screenings
- urinary tract infections testing and treatment
General Health Care
- anemia testing
- cholesterol screening
- diabetes screening
- physical exams, including for employment and sports
- flu vaccines
- help with quitting smoking
- high blood pressure screening
- tetanus vaccines
- thyroid screening
- STD testing, treatment, and vaccines
So conservatives: tell me again why Planned Parenthood’s funding should be eliminated?
This might be the best quote I’ve ever seen.
i hate stuff like this with a passion because it completely ignores all societal factors and deeply misogynistic views that brainwash everyone into believing certain things - in this case, that people perceived as women should be hairless. it portrays these choices as completely equal, when they are anything but. when not every porn star is waxed to an inch of their life, when men don’t balk at the idea of eating (or even fucking!) hairy pussy, when 99.9999999% of society is telling you, from the day you are born, that feminine = hairless, THEN i will respect this quote.
When I don’t have almost every fucking internet feminist out there getting all up in my grill because I choose to trim my triangle and shave my ass hair, around my junk, and my legs and pits then I’ll stop needing to see quotes like this. Yup, I shave parts of my junk and my pits are hairless. There’s no possible way I could have chosen this for myself. Nope, must just be brainwashed. Silly me for thinking I understand my own choices. I thought I was just shaving because I like the texture of my leg skin and because I don’t like how some of my pubes catch in my underpants occasionally. Damn, I was wrong! I’m clearly only doing it because porn.
I fucking hate it when people say shit like the second commentary above. As if doing anything that traditionally fits a stereotype of femininity—makeup, shaving, stay at home mothers, etc.—means you’re brainlessly doing what patriarchy tells you to do. Fuck you. As long as I know I have a choice, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me taking all the hair off my ladyspace.
― Ursula K. Le Guin (via oh-sayitaintso)
Hey fellow Radical CUNTS, any recommended reading for winter break?